New Year’s Schmesolutions

As I reflect on 2013, I could actually cringe, but I know for certain that I am not leaving any of it behind. And by that I mean I want to take all that I have learned and experienced with me into my new year as guidelines for 2014. Only my very close friends and family know that the last year was probably one of the most difficult years I’ve ever had, but it was also one of the most fun, exciting and rewarding times in my life; pertinent to my personal development and where I am now. I came out a little bruised, but I took time out the thank my hardships and the people who I let go and the ones that walked away because I came out stronger and wiser and I would probably do it again. Ok, no, but in reality when you know what you know, you just know, you know? How is there such a thing as a mistake when clearly at that moment you made the best choice with the facts that you had gathered. I am proud of remaining graceful and grateful when things headed south and I over came my fear of losing everything when in truth, everything that I had was all in my heart and no one could ever take that away from me. Society through media, or perhaps your next door neighbour, will sometimes make you feel like you don’t have enough or that you aren’t enough because you don’t have enough. Times are changing and so are the old ways of thinking. My purging of old energy was difficult at first because it was all familiar, but letting go is so empowering and so cleansing.

When a new year arrives, so many of the same resolutions are made from the years before. I laughed when I asked my friend what his resolutions were and he said his was to do the ones he made last year. For the last few years before 2013, like many people, I stopped making resolutions because I never followed through with them. They were the usual: work out more, eat less junk, cut out red meat, spend less, etc. We are all great at goal setting but what is a goal or dream without a plan? I stopped making promises to the usual resolutions because those are things everyone should be doing on a regular basis. You cannot follow through or meet goals if you are not mentally prepared or if you don’t have an actual step by step list of to do’s to get there. So how do you get there? Try setting goals that have to do with Self and then external goals will be met much easier.

Last year, instead of making external resolutions I decided to make an internal resolution and for 2013 it was to use my voice. Yes, it seems like I already do but actually when in doubt I ask what would love do and then I decide. Many people like to challenge me on all sorts of topics and when it get’s a bit aggressive I usually step back and just let the person continue or let them have the last word. Last year I didn’t, I used my voice and spoke up and the freedom that comes with the right to stand up for my beliefs and really speak up was so refreshing and shut out some really negative energy but of course I was still respectful and graceful. I decided to let bullies like that know that if they can dish it then they can take it too. This year I have decided to go with my gut instinct. The very first time. I’ve realized that giving people the benefit of the doubt is wrong. It’s not them, it’s me. Whenever there is doubt it is no benefit to you or your gut. Remember that actions speak louder than words and they must always be in harmony. Stop second guessing your gut because your gut is your second brain if not first in so many ways, physically and mentally. So that’s it folks, go with my gut the first time, never second guess my gut instinct and if someone is doing something that is not in alignment with what I would do or believe, although we are all different, then the time has come when I have to let go of people who are self-destructive. I think that was my biggest lesson for 2013; you can’t help those that hurt themselves without getting hurt yourself. You can only guide someone so far. Moving forward I’m not making any resolutions, I’m making a promise to Self. Cheers to 2014!

Truly,

@RinaChong

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