How do you see others? How you see others is what they will see in themselves. These are friends, family, partners, employees, coworkers and most importantly, children. When you see the best in people, people will be their best for you. If you are someone that immediately thinks negatively about people you haven’t even met yet, it may be a reflection of what you really think of yourself and how you think you would be judged. When you do that, you are only pre-judging and that is never fair. It’s not fair because you are creating an un-truth in your mind and assuming that you know something when really you don’t.
I remember meeting a lady at a function last year and she seemed very distant and cold. I was wondering what this woman’s problem with me was. I was as nice as I could be and always open to welcoming new friends and I started to feel like there was something wrong with me! Later we became really good friends and she admitted that when she had first met me she was intimidated, but once she got to know me she couldn’t believe she felt the way she did with me because I was the complete opposite of intimidating. For me, I always think the best of people when I meet them. Even if they don’t seem to be on their ‘A’ game perhaps they are going through something difficult at the moment. Always be a light and keep on shining no matter what.
Focus 90% on peoples strengths and 10% on their weaknesses and help them by recognizing all the good that they do and not always being the ‘weakness’ police. People work harder when they are appreciated because if you are someone who is always pointing out their faults, it starts to chip away at their ego and less of what you want them to do will be what they will do. Their mindset will revert to why they are doing it for you when they get crapped on anyways and I promise it will go downhill even more. Go back to a time when you were at work and your boss would call you to their office. And if you weren’t doing so well at your job, remember how they always pointed it out so then you developed the feeling of dread to see them and or even waking up to go to work. How did that make you feel? How would you have done it differently?
At work or at home, with spouses, partners, roommates, if you are Mr. Negative and pointing out faults is all you do, then you can bet it will be closing time soon. Treat people how you want to see them, bring out the best in them and celebrate their strengths. Give constructive criticism, but also offer to help them to make the positive changes. Be a leader. You can’t tell a child that they are doing something wrong and not show them the correct way of doing things so why would it be different for an adult who clearly needs some direction. By leading and genuinely caring, it will create trust and bring forth authentic intentions within to see someone develop and become better because of you. Today, whatever it is that is being done incorrectly by someone, praise them for their efforts and compliment them first and then lead the way.