November 28, 2020
The purpose of this post is to get you to dig deep. I mean really dig deep. I used to have the ball and chain of the corporate walls and my managers, bosses, or supervisors made me dig deep on how I was going to make them look better in front of their bosses. I am not your boss and I have no ulterior motive except that I want you to dig deep for yourSELF.
If you’re like most people, and you’re unhappy with where you are in life, the only way it’s going to change is if you change the way you see things and if you can’t (let’s be honest here, if you ‘won’t’) then you’re going to have to change the way you do things. However, the only way you’re going to be able to do anything different is by changing your mindset, first and foremost. And there will be many things that you’ll have to change externally to get into a different mindset which I will discuss later.
In all of what we do, big or small actions, they are triggered by a thought. Thoughts turn into things. Thoughts turn into things. Would you allow me to be your online coach just for this moment? Take a pen (blue ink preferably) and paper out and spend some time to write down your answers. There are no right or wrong answers and there is no quiz at the end.
Let’s say for example you really don’t like the job that you have – you hate the hours, you’re bored of the work, there’s no advancement, you hate the commute and perhaps you can’t stand your boss, the passion is gone. You are definitely not alone, I have been there many, many times. So, the million-dollar question is: Why do you do the things that you do? Many would say it’s for the 2-week paycheque in order to feed their family. What is your answer? Take a moment to write them down.
So let’s move on to what you want your future to look like… What are you basing your future on? Are you basing it on what other people say about you? Are you basing it on the scope of your current skills? Are you basing it on demographics?
We are nearing a new year just around the corner and people that are goal diggers have already written down their goals. If you haven’t yet, (and this is one of the main reasons why many people do not excel and find themselves in the same old, same old) what are your goals? Take 10 minutes to write them down.
Awesome! That is the first step! Your goals look great! Now, if we were working together I would push you harder, however, if you aren’t used to writing out your goals then this is a great start and I’m proud of you!
Now, here is the billion-dollar question: Are you INTERESTED in achieving your goals, OR are you COMMITTED?
What’s the difference?
A million-dollar difference…
If you’re interested you’ll do what’s convenient for you, which means you’ll come up with excuses why you can’t, you’ll use your history as your roadblock, you’ll use how your parents brought you up as an excuse, you’ll use the fact that your mother abused you, that your father was an alcoholic or gambler, that your family never had any money – basically you’ll use anything and everything as reasons why you can’t. But in reality, it’s because you don’t want to.
However, if you’re committed you’ll do whatever it takes. You’ll let go of your stories and excuses, of all the reasons that you currently have that are formulating your identity of yourself and you’ll learn how to let that go and become who you were destined to become! And the second step is the planning – a goal without a plan is simply a wish!
But I know you’re thinking that it’s not that easy. It’s not. Trust me. I was so embarrassed and ashamed that my mother was a single mom, who raised me as an only child and lived in the projects. As I look back, here she was a woman of strength who was kind, caring, independent, and yet abusive to me in so many ways because she was so hurt by my father leaving us and was abused when she was younger. She carried that luggage with her and I carried that as an excuse for me not to excel. If you are in the same situation you can break the pattern, but it all starts with YOU.
I made up stories in my own head about not being good enough and limited myself because I didn’t grow up with a silver spoon in my mouth, I never saw myself worthy enough to have what I wanted. I only wish I had someone like me back then to guide me, but all I had were books and audio cassettes that I studied, and then I realized that I am more than what my past defines me as and so are you. As a result of my breakthrough, at an early age, I was blessed with my openness to learn and be coachable and live a life where I can be generous and help others.
If you want a successful business you hire a business coach, if you want to compete in the Olympics you hire a fitness coach, if you want to build a house, you hire a contractor. If you truly want things to change in your life, then I urge you to find a life coach or mentor or find someone that inspires you to be better to break you out of your shell and know that you will have to do the work. You have to dig deep, dig into your inner wealth, and furthermore, rather than just having some goals, without a plan you cannot execute. Goals without a plan are just dreams and wishes. If you don’t make the changes necessary then accept it and be happy where you are. So now, ask yourself, it’s nearly 2021, are you just interested in your dreams or are you actually committed? If you are committed you will stop at nothing!